By her, my whole life is devastated,
The losses can never be estimated,
Suddenly her denial, she intimated,
Like a balloon, I became deflated.
My disappointment, I never exhibited,
For her leaving me, I sadly permitted,
Rays of deep gloom, my heart remitted,
A brave act of sacrifice, I just committed.
When a person is least interested,
In pursuing, time mustn't be wasted,
Severe mental agony was created,
All my hopes of love were cremated.
Through holy marriage, I became related,
In living a fresh life, I gladly participated,
By hoping my mind would be activated,
But, my approach was so sadly belated.
I became psychologically enervated,
By serious troubles, I was badly invited,
By even petty matters, I got excited,
My day of leaving the world, I awaited.
Though loving act she only initiated,
Contract of love, she cruelly vitiated,
My leading a miserable life, I hated,
My mind's depression aggravated.
My heart, bitter feelings only dominated,
In acute depression, events culminated,
Day by day, my power gradually depleted,
Forty years of living, I one day completed.
By nothing I feel properly rejuvenated,
By depression, my mind is detonated,
As per my capacity, money is donated,
I expect my life will get abbreviated.
Living has become very complicated,
My self-estimation has depreciated,
I pray so that God can be propitiated,
To pills and insomnia, I am addicted.
By God, death-prescription must be dictated,
From this world, I must be soon eliminated,
I am not afraid if by death I am separated,
God will feel comforted if I have departed.
A severe punishment is inflicted,
Optimism is by me fully evicted,
By stress and worry, I am afflicted,
To have sheer doom, I am indicted.
Will I be, by the Almighty, protected?
Will my defects be, by Him, corrected?
On the right path, will I get directed?
Will my life be, by Him, soon perfected?
M V Venkataraman